The Importance of Partnership In Surrogacy
Surrogacy is more than just pregnancy and delivery, it's a decision made for the whole family. Surrogacy Center of Philadelphia is primed to help with this decision!
Surrogacy is a life-changing experience for many people, especially for Gestational Carriers and their families. Having the support of a partner can make all the difference in a journey, which is why it is essential that the whole family is on board when making the decision to become a surrogate.
Surrogacy is more than just pregnancy and delivery. There are many stages in the process, which takes an average of 15-18 months. Without a teammate to help you stay on track, take care of responsibilities at home, and assist with transportation, your journey could be quite challenging, even with the support of a great agency.
Surrogate Rebecca Perkins has found an amazing support system in her husband Ryan throughout her surrogacy journey. They had discussed surrogacy in the past, with Rebecca expressing the desire to help close friends. They made the decision to work with the Surrogacy Center of Philadelphia in 2020.
“It was me that approached her about using a local agency as an option since I thought the chance one of our friends would need a surrogate was very low. It is something that she had always wanted to do to give back to friends, and something that we thought would be a way to serve others. I did a bit of research on the local and national agency options and we both thought it was potentially a great option for us to help others who were looking to build a family,” shared Ryan.
For couples who are still deciding if surrogacy is right for them, there are many issues that should be discussed. Is the whole family ready to make a long-term commitment to the process? What does your support system look like, especially if the gestational carrier is put on bed rest? Is the partner willing to help with injectable medications? Do you have family financial goals in mind that can be met with the compensation received?
Once you decide that surrogacy is a commitment that your family can take on, there are still additional issues that should be discussed. Director of the Surrogacy Center of Philadelphia, Andrea Hoshmand McAfee emphasized, “As an agency, it is important that we are matching gestational carriers with like-minded families. When deciding to become a surrogate, you should have a discussion with your partner about what values are important to your family and what are your expectations for communication throughout the journey.”
When reflecting on the matching process, Ryan shared a similar advice, “Be honest in what you are looking for in [Intended Parents] and take time to find the right match. We are on the same page and have a great relationship with our IPs which makes the process so much better.”
Becoming a surrogate is an empowering, personally enriching experience. The partners of surrogates have cherished role in the process. What is Ryan’s one piece of advice? “I try to play the comedic relief in this experience. There are a lot of points throughout the process (legal steps, fertility shots, serious discussions) where I am not the key participant, so I try to lighten the mood through fun memes for example. In addition to this, just being there for your partner and supporting late night Margherita pizza runs, taking care of the kids or house, and comforting her whenever she needs it.”